Hope you've had a chance to see the Help-Portrait recap video. If not, it's a part of the blog. Check it out. It was such a great day, for so many different reasons. The first of course being the chance to do something incredible for people in need. That was so great. Meeting the people, and getting to hang out together with them was a great thing. Getting to borrow someone's super nice photography setup wasn't too bad either. I shot with some incredible lights and backdrop for a while, and it's given me the "buy nice gear" bug. But that's for another time later in life.
Here is one of the things I really enjoyed about this project: I got to be a part of something bigger than me, just for me. I wasn't doing it because I had to, and I wasn't doing it because I am the youth pastor and it's a part of my job. I got to do this just because there was a great opportunity to do something good for someone else. And that was great.
Don't get me wrong, I love my job (most days). And I love getting to lead students out on missions and different things to try and point to a lifestyle of being missional. I think without an intentional bent on missional living, Christianity is a joke. It's like driving a car with no tires. To those who follow Jesus it's an insult to the redemptive work He did to never get outside the walls of the church. To those that don't follow Jesus, it points to the problem that caused society to move to a post-church mindset: that church and following Jesus is all about ME, and what I get out of the deal. And that we never get out and actually care about people. Okay, that's a post for another time. I am stepping off my soapbox now.
And so while I love what I get to do on that front in my job, I LOVED getting to help lead something and be a part of a team of people all working towards the same end. It felt so great to just go and love people, and not have to worry about too many logistics. It was fantastic. LOVED it. We are already talking about doing another one in the spring.
Which leads me to a question to end with: What are you doing to create good out there? How are you dropping bombs of hope and love on people who don't have any? How can you? Is it through your job? your hobbies? Can the things you do for a living or in your free time impact others around you?
They should.
Live deeper.
For my one, follower, and anyone else who reads, if you don't know, I'm a youth pastor by profession when I quit slinging coffee. And I love what I do, in spite of my awkward and sometimes jaded upbringing in church and church culture.
So, I missed out on the national youth worker's convention this year, which usually bums me out, but what I saw of this year, I think skipping might have been a win for me. That's a topic for a different time probably, though part of why I am so excited is that I get to go see THIS GUY with my buddy, THIS GUY. A much better deal by far methinks.
Anyways, I have been streaming some of the general sessions from nywc just so I can hear part of the conversation that is going on, and the last (?) session had Francis Chan speaking, who is a super cool guy that I respect a great deal, because he is a lot more honest than I think most people working for churches would ever be, without fear of some committee coming and asking him to leave since he seems so disinterested. Again, another blog for another day.
Here is my point: he said this thing that is so encouraging, and so challenging all at the same time, so here it is:
The old me used to cry because of the lost, and then I became a pastor and now I don't cry..I want the old me back" - Francis Chan
I LOVE this quote. LOVE it. And here is why. This is life for a pastor, or at least that has been my experience. It is SO easy to get lost in planning for the next meeting, going over curriculum for the next small group, planning worship, scheduling events and transportation while considering security and volunteer roles/involvement that we completely miss the point of our jobs. It makes me wonder if there is something fundamentally wrong in the way we do our jobs. And, I think that this spreads to other jobs too, I don't think this is some "special privilege" for people working for churches. I think we all get lost in the small things, the over thought, over complicated things of life/work and we miss out. I mean, what if (for me as a youth pastor and you as "insert your job/time consuming responsibility here") we totally miss Jesus because he is in the slumped shoulders of a sad student that I miss because I am planning my report for the next meeting?
I think he brings up a great point, that while ministry is a job, and we definitely have responsibilities and stuff to do and get finished and such, is it worth doing if we are so wrapped up in it that we have no joy in our job? No interaction with our community? I can relate to that idea a lot, as I struggle with having a sense of community in my present location. I have a great youth group community, but my family has youth and youth sponsors, and that's our tribe. Which is great, but is not a group we do a lot with outside of youth stuff, which I step into as a youth pastor, as a staff person. I don't really get to be at church and be IN church. I'm always the youth guy, which means I get asked about computers, why teenagers are so noisy, why did I decide to do youth ministry and not go to seminary to be a "real pastor?" I never really go to worship to worship. It's like my worship time gets sucked up by the job. I wonder, if all us pastoral types were really honest, would we admit that we get to worship or not? and REALLY worship, not just sit in a worship service/experience.
Put it another way, do we go through the motions of worshipping and living out our relationship with Jesus, or is it a formality to serve our careers? Do we weep at things that God weeps for? Are we moved with compassion for those in need, or do we pat them on the back, say Jesus loves you, and offer them a bus ticket to the food for the homeless program down the road?
"...I became a pastor and now I don't cry..." that hits hard. I wonder if I'm the only one who feels like the job sucks out the life from the calling. I don't think I am, but I don't know how many would be honest and say that. I expect most would acknowledge that it happens, give a good theological argument for it being a "time in life where ______" followed by a bible verse or two about it, a couple verses about how God wants to change that, and an offer to pray for me, which would all feel kind of trite in a way because I think it takes a BIG thing that is deeply embedded in our hearts, and reduces it to an almost greeting card-like thing. Which frankly - no offense to those that do this - offends me deeply.
So I find myself glad I didn't go, but still considering things/conversations from NYWC. And praying that I work quickly and effectively, so that I can get the "work" done that I need to, but still be free and available to do the "ministry" that is what God really called me to.
live deeper
So, I missed out on the national youth worker's convention this year, which usually bums me out, but what I saw of this year, I think skipping might have been a win for me. That's a topic for a different time probably, though part of why I am so excited is that I get to go see THIS GUY with my buddy, THIS GUY. A much better deal by far methinks.
Anyways, I have been streaming some of the general sessions from nywc just so I can hear part of the conversation that is going on, and the last (?) session had Francis Chan speaking, who is a super cool guy that I respect a great deal, because he is a lot more honest than I think most people working for churches would ever be, without fear of some committee coming and asking him to leave since he seems so disinterested. Again, another blog for another day.
Here is my point: he said this thing that is so encouraging, and so challenging all at the same time, so here it is:
The old me used to cry because of the lost, and then I became a pastor and now I don't cry..I want the old me back" - Francis Chan
I LOVE this quote. LOVE it. And here is why. This is life for a pastor, or at least that has been my experience. It is SO easy to get lost in planning for the next meeting, going over curriculum for the next small group, planning worship, scheduling events and transportation while considering security and volunteer roles/involvement that we completely miss the point of our jobs. It makes me wonder if there is something fundamentally wrong in the way we do our jobs. And, I think that this spreads to other jobs too, I don't think this is some "special privilege" for people working for churches. I think we all get lost in the small things, the over thought, over complicated things of life/work and we miss out. I mean, what if (for me as a youth pastor and you as "insert your job/time consuming responsibility here") we totally miss Jesus because he is in the slumped shoulders of a sad student that I miss because I am planning my report for the next meeting?
I think he brings up a great point, that while ministry is a job, and we definitely have responsibilities and stuff to do and get finished and such, is it worth doing if we are so wrapped up in it that we have no joy in our job? No interaction with our community? I can relate to that idea a lot, as I struggle with having a sense of community in my present location. I have a great youth group community, but my family has youth and youth sponsors, and that's our tribe. Which is great, but is not a group we do a lot with outside of youth stuff, which I step into as a youth pastor, as a staff person. I don't really get to be at church and be IN church. I'm always the youth guy, which means I get asked about computers, why teenagers are so noisy, why did I decide to do youth ministry and not go to seminary to be a "real pastor?" I never really go to worship to worship. It's like my worship time gets sucked up by the job. I wonder, if all us pastoral types were really honest, would we admit that we get to worship or not? and REALLY worship, not just sit in a worship service/experience.
Put it another way, do we go through the motions of worshipping and living out our relationship with Jesus, or is it a formality to serve our careers? Do we weep at things that God weeps for? Are we moved with compassion for those in need, or do we pat them on the back, say Jesus loves you, and offer them a bus ticket to the food for the homeless program down the road?
"...I became a pastor and now I don't cry..." that hits hard. I wonder if I'm the only one who feels like the job sucks out the life from the calling. I don't think I am, but I don't know how many would be honest and say that. I expect most would acknowledge that it happens, give a good theological argument for it being a "time in life where ______" followed by a bible verse or two about it, a couple verses about how God wants to change that, and an offer to pray for me, which would all feel kind of trite in a way because I think it takes a BIG thing that is deeply embedded in our hearts, and reduces it to an almost greeting card-like thing. Which frankly - no offense to those that do this - offends me deeply.
So I find myself glad I didn't go, but still considering things/conversations from NYWC. And praying that I work quickly and effectively, so that I can get the "work" done that I need to, but still be free and available to do the "ministry" that is what God really called me to.
live deeper
As you may or may not know, I am a fan of local art, and think it's good for a person to be about supporting the locals. That said, one of the local guys I love put a couple songs online, in game format. It's pretty fantastic. So, I said to myself, why not share?
Here it is! Enjoy! (And trust me, I will ACTUALLY write something soon!)
Here it is! Enjoy! (And trust me, I will ACTUALLY write something soon!)
So, I'm really trying to think of something good for you, but I am having a hard time getting my brain to get firing. It's been a long day. Good, but long. So, I'll leave you with a picture of luke from the other day. He is a huge fan of the outside. I think that's so great. Hopefully he can keep that going. Anyways, til I have something useful to say, here ya go:
Hey gang,
so I have a, guess he would be a facebook friend? we know a few of the same people, and have swapped an email or two...
anyways, so my facebook buddy Jeremy was a guest on another photographer's blog the other day, and posted this video. I'll put it below here in a second. Check out Jeremy's full website too.
But, here's what I think would be awesome. What if we did this? What if we all participated in this deal? It could be the coolest way to give someone a great Christmas, I think. I have some ideas in my head, but I would love to make it a big crew project. What do you guys think? Let me know! Here's the vid:
I am absolutely LOVING this idea. Let's do it! Who's in? If you're up for it, go check out http://www.help-portrait.com/ and get on board! I think this could be awesome.
Live deeper.
so I have a, guess he would be a facebook friend? we know a few of the same people, and have swapped an email or two...
anyways, so my facebook buddy Jeremy was a guest on another photographer's blog the other day, and posted this video. I'll put it below here in a second. Check out Jeremy's full website too.
But, here's what I think would be awesome. What if we did this? What if we all participated in this deal? It could be the coolest way to give someone a great Christmas, I think. I have some ideas in my head, but I would love to make it a big crew project. What do you guys think? Let me know! Here's the vid:
I am absolutely LOVING this idea. Let's do it! Who's in? If you're up for it, go check out http://www.help-portrait.com/ and get on board! I think this could be awesome.
Live deeper.
Wow, so I apparently haven't even stopped by my own blog in a REALLY long time. Not to do anything but check my blog and make sure it was still working at least. It seems I have survived the summer. School is back in session now, and I feel like I can take a breather for a couple of minutes. I loved my summer, don't get me wrong, but being gone for 4 out of 12 weeks is a LOT, especially for a guy not used to that many weeks gone.
But, that said, it was a challenge for me to be gone, to be on the move, and to still be a husband/dad/youth pastor/barista. Parts of it I absolutely loved, other parts I never want to repeat.
But, coming out of the summer, I have had a LOT of thoughts floating around in my head. Thoughts about who I am, who I am wanting to be, and how to re-learn living out of the deepest parts of my heart.
Part of what I realized this summer is my need to be bold. Listening to people speak at camps, I watched people speak boldly about their love of Jesus, and not be concerned with stepping on toes, or over-simplifying the gospel. I don't mind offending people because I think at it's core the gospel is quite offensive, but I sometimes try to make the idea so easy to grasp that I overdo it and strip out some of the depth and meaning unintentionally. I need to change that. So, I find myself in a place of retooling what and how I say things, and making sure that my trying to get the point across doesn't get lost in translation.
Another thing I have found from the summer that I need to fix is my being consistent, and living on intentionally. My wife, who is AWESOME at pulling out her "crap detector" has worked me over in a good way with that thing. Here's what happened: we got into a couple of "normal" spouse-ly brushes this summer, and I found myself saying the phrase "well, I didn't mean to _____" which in my mind was true, and not all bad, right? When out of the blue God jumps in my wife's mouth and smacked me upside the head with the point "yeah, you're not meaning to do ______, and you're not doing anything at all." BAM.
So, I find myself now in need of some changes, but changes for the better. I fight as much as I can to be genuine, and to live out of my heart, but it seems my heart needs a bit of work. I need to "not try to do ____" and "do _____" and be more a person of action. And even more so than that, my action needs to be rooted in love, which it wasn't always this summer, as I got caught up in being too busy, and not saying no to things.
Fortunately, I have found some friends to give me food for thought, and inspiration, they're called heartsupport. and they are awesome people. I have local friends to hang with for sure, and I need that community, but I love HS because it's a group of people who are there on purpose to be people seeking hope, love, and to live deep and from the right place. You should check them out, you might like them.
Well, off I go, to see a good friend and talk life and such. I love OkC, and this buddy of mine is deeply embedded in some amazing things in OkC. I am looking forward to what we can do together in the fall. Should be awesome.
live deeper. (for real, and from the right places)
But, that said, it was a challenge for me to be gone, to be on the move, and to still be a husband/dad/youth pastor/barista. Parts of it I absolutely loved, other parts I never want to repeat.
But, coming out of the summer, I have had a LOT of thoughts floating around in my head. Thoughts about who I am, who I am wanting to be, and how to re-learn living out of the deepest parts of my heart.
Part of what I realized this summer is my need to be bold. Listening to people speak at camps, I watched people speak boldly about their love of Jesus, and not be concerned with stepping on toes, or over-simplifying the gospel. I don't mind offending people because I think at it's core the gospel is quite offensive, but I sometimes try to make the idea so easy to grasp that I overdo it and strip out some of the depth and meaning unintentionally. I need to change that. So, I find myself in a place of retooling what and how I say things, and making sure that my trying to get the point across doesn't get lost in translation.
Another thing I have found from the summer that I need to fix is my being consistent, and living on intentionally. My wife, who is AWESOME at pulling out her "crap detector" has worked me over in a good way with that thing. Here's what happened: we got into a couple of "normal" spouse-ly brushes this summer, and I found myself saying the phrase "well, I didn't mean to _____" which in my mind was true, and not all bad, right? When out of the blue God jumps in my wife's mouth and smacked me upside the head with the point "yeah, you're not meaning to do ______, and you're not doing anything at all." BAM.
So, I find myself now in need of some changes, but changes for the better. I fight as much as I can to be genuine, and to live out of my heart, but it seems my heart needs a bit of work. I need to "not try to do ____" and "do _____" and be more a person of action. And even more so than that, my action needs to be rooted in love, which it wasn't always this summer, as I got caught up in being too busy, and not saying no to things.
Fortunately, I have found some friends to give me food for thought, and inspiration, they're called heartsupport. and they are awesome people. I have local friends to hang with for sure, and I need that community, but I love HS because it's a group of people who are there on purpose to be people seeking hope, love, and to live deep and from the right place. You should check them out, you might like them.
Well, off I go, to see a good friend and talk life and such. I love OkC, and this buddy of mine is deeply embedded in some amazing things in OkC. I am looking forward to what we can do together in the fall. Should be awesome.
live deeper. (for real, and from the right places)
Hello all! It has been a busy few weeks. So much going on! But it has been a journey to say the least.
Family is good, though loving family well is a challenge when you work 60+ a week. Luke is rocking the tooth bearing world, and about to start dominating the running/walking world. Also looking like he might be an awesome footballer. My guess is he could be the american wayne rooney. He's got some work left, but he's already on the road to a good strong kick. Courtney is doing a fantastic job with Luke. He's the awesome kid he is because he's got a great mom watching him all day. I don't give her enough praise & credit, but that doesn't make her work there any less awesome. We've got friends coming in soon too to hang out, and that will be fun too. Can't wait for that!
I started a new blog mostly in relation to design stuff that I've been doing. I got an awesome chance to do some graphic design stuff for wesley umc, and that was a blast to walk through the whole process. I've still got a bit of stuff to finish for them (customizing business cards with names/titles) but other than that it's all done. Helped finance my purchase of one of these. Been loving that purchase too. And I'm looking at my first big "speaking engagement" for a camp. I had a one night deal where I pinch hit for a friend, but this would be a legit week at a camp. It's kind of daunting to think I'd have something worth saying, let alone 4 days worth of something worth saying. But we'll see if it all pans out. I'm hoping it will. Could be a cool cool opportunity.
For those of you who haven't heard the whole story, here's the last 6+ weeks of life. I was told I was being let go on May 31st from my church job, and then May 11th they changed their mind and decided to let me stay. So, I was leaving, but now I'm here to stay. It was a heck of a process to have to go through, but the thing that was interesting was the way people came alive over this deal.
I have to be honest, it was insanely humbling (almost awkward) to see kids in the youth and the parents and volunteers rally for me and work so hard to help me keep my job. But it was a good, constructive conversation on all sides, the kids, the parents, the church leadership, and we're all moving forward and doing our best to join in a great direction from here out.
I hope we can keep up this energy as we get further away from this thing. The challenge of something like this is that people got passionate about something, and great things came from it, and now we have the task of moving forward and seeing what else we can do; what else God can do through us if we get passionate like this. I'm hoping that we'll see some amazing stuff come out of this. I really do.
And so starts week one of camp for me next week. 2 more plus the possible partial week of speaking. It's going to be a big summer. Praying that I don't spread myself too thin. But I think if I'm working on being intentional, it'll work out. It's life, you know? Give & take, hope and fight, peace & pushing.
Live deeper.
in honor of star trek coming out, here's a little something for you all:
if you're on facebook, this probably didn't embed, so here's the link:
http://current.com/items/90029658_death-star-destroys-enterprise.htm
see ya!
A friend of mine posted this on his blog the other day, and I checked it out yesterday, it was great to see. It's been a great thing to be a part of invisible children, and the things they're doing. It's been so crazy to see how this random group of guys with a movie have been able to help encourage so much change in the world. And it looks like they're on to the next part of their plan. They aren't tipping any cards though, so I'm curious to see what they do.
You should check it out too. Here's the link:
http://www.invisiblechildren.com/april2009/index.html
So for most of you, this won't be that big a deal. This is more for the my younger friends who haven't grown up in the place I did. (So mostly my youth group probably) Some of you don't know, and some of you do, but there has been what we'll call a major pothole in the road that has left the car broken down on the side of the road. I can't give you all the details yet, and honestly, this probably isn't the place for that. Ask me if you want to know. But, we'll say we've had a friend let us down, and it has hit a whole group of us very hard. And we'll never see this person again most likely, not to mention what their life will look like. He pretty much destroyed his life, and many of our friends have taken shrapnel from it.
And we're grieving, and it's hard, and it sucks, but the thing that has me struck is the issue of community & integrity. This thing makes me wonder, if we were in a place where we could all be brutally honest with each other, would this thing have looked different? If this buddy of ours had a place to be transparent and open with someone, ANYone, could this have played out different?
And I see this in our group too. Our group is fragmented. Our church is fragmented, and we're trying to unlearn what we see, though it's hard to break free of this. We better than we used to be, but there are still cliques that need to die. Relationships that need to change, some that need to be opened up, some that need to start at all.
Think of the question this way: If the goal of us following Jesus is to be fully alive, can we be fully alive if we're not fully known?
This is why I am thinking about this stuff. We need community, and REAL community. A place where we can share our struggles, our joys, our pains, our temptations, our loves, our passions. We're all friends, and we know things that we like to do, places we like to go, but do we know each others struggles? What pains does your friend carry that you know about? Do you think there are some that you don't know about? Do you carry things that no one knows about?
Do you know what happens when we don't share those things with each other? They go unchecked. And when they go unchecked, they fester. That festering grows into something worse than what it was. Sort of like when you leave juice outside in the bottle for a long time. At first it just smells, but as it goes unchecked, it starts to smell worse. Soon it starts to turn color, and it grows fuzz. And then next thing you know, you've got a tiny little bit of juice with a BIG, HUGE, GREEN & BLACK patch of moss on top of it. And if you were to drink it, it would make you horribly sick, if not kill you. If you drink enough of the moldy mossiness, it will kill you.
So the question is, do you want to leave things unchecked?
Here's my fear, and I feel like there's a level of truth to this, because I feel like I've seen it play itself out before, but here it is: If all of us leave things unchecked for whatever reason - fear, shame, guilt, embarrassment - they will fester. And if that happens in a group of people, then we're a group of festering people. And on the one hand, that's the Church, a group of sick people. But, are we trying to get better? Are we staying in our festered state? If we stay put and let the mold grow and run it's course, we'll die. And our group will die. Our church will die.
We have to fight for our hearts. We have to fight for our lives. For our group. And that starts with community. So, where do you go from here? You can get sicker if you want, or you can fight. Fight the sickness. Rebel against your own indifference. Scream into your apathy that you're not going to stay put. Shine light in dark places.
And in that, may we find hope. And know that love is deeper and bigger than our pains and struggles.
live deeper...
And we're grieving, and it's hard, and it sucks, but the thing that has me struck is the issue of community & integrity. This thing makes me wonder, if we were in a place where we could all be brutally honest with each other, would this thing have looked different? If this buddy of ours had a place to be transparent and open with someone, ANYone, could this have played out different?
And I see this in our group too. Our group is fragmented. Our church is fragmented, and we're trying to unlearn what we see, though it's hard to break free of this. We better than we used to be, but there are still cliques that need to die. Relationships that need to change, some that need to be opened up, some that need to start at all.
Think of the question this way: If the goal of us following Jesus is to be fully alive, can we be fully alive if we're not fully known?
This is why I am thinking about this stuff. We need community, and REAL community. A place where we can share our struggles, our joys, our pains, our temptations, our loves, our passions. We're all friends, and we know things that we like to do, places we like to go, but do we know each others struggles? What pains does your friend carry that you know about? Do you think there are some that you don't know about? Do you carry things that no one knows about?
Do you know what happens when we don't share those things with each other? They go unchecked. And when they go unchecked, they fester. That festering grows into something worse than what it was. Sort of like when you leave juice outside in the bottle for a long time. At first it just smells, but as it goes unchecked, it starts to smell worse. Soon it starts to turn color, and it grows fuzz. And then next thing you know, you've got a tiny little bit of juice with a BIG, HUGE, GREEN & BLACK patch of moss on top of it. And if you were to drink it, it would make you horribly sick, if not kill you. If you drink enough of the moldy mossiness, it will kill you.
So the question is, do you want to leave things unchecked?
Here's my fear, and I feel like there's a level of truth to this, because I feel like I've seen it play itself out before, but here it is: If all of us leave things unchecked for whatever reason - fear, shame, guilt, embarrassment - they will fester. And if that happens in a group of people, then we're a group of festering people. And on the one hand, that's the Church, a group of sick people. But, are we trying to get better? Are we staying in our festered state? If we stay put and let the mold grow and run it's course, we'll die. And our group will die. Our church will die.
We have to fight for our hearts. We have to fight for our lives. For our group. And that starts with community. So, where do you go from here? You can get sicker if you want, or you can fight. Fight the sickness. Rebel against your own indifference. Scream into your apathy that you're not going to stay put. Shine light in dark places.
And in that, may we find hope. And know that love is deeper and bigger than our pains and struggles.
live deeper...
Saw this today, thought we could all use some inspiration today.
apparently it won't embed right, so here's the link:
http://www.news9.com/Global/category.asp?C=116601&autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=3322720
apparently it won't embed right, so here's the link:
http://www.news9.com/Global/category.asp?C=116601&autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=3322720
Thanks to Marko @ youth specialties for pointing me towards this thing. We HAVE to find one for some event sometime. I don't care who's camp it is. Anyone want to do a joint retreat before it gets cold down at crosspoint?
null - Watch more free videos
I mean, really!
null - Watch more free videos
I mean, really!
if you've talked to me at all in the last 2 years, you've probably heard me talk about To Write Love On Her Arms. They are GREAT people. And I think they are doing some really, really amazing things. Saying things that need to be said, regardless of how comfortable people want to be, or how uncomfortable the things TWLOHA address are. They had a night at house of blues recently, and I really enjoyed watching it. I've watched it twice actually. I say watched, it's really more my version of radio in the office. : ) Great stuff from great people though. Go see it for yourself.
Watch this show and more at SyncLive.com
Watch this show and more at SyncLive.com
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